Just spent most of the week sick as a dog and listening to Mom bitch about how I don’t want to do anything. No, no I don’t. I’m fucking sick with the yuck. It’s okay for her to sleep all day when she is sick until she is well but not me. I grow tired of this double standard shit.
Mood Score Key:
Sliding Hypomania = 1 ~ Hypomania = 2 ~ Mania = 3 ~ Baseline (My Normal) = 0
Sliding Depression = -1 ~ Depression = -2 ~ Severe Depression = -3 ~ M = Mixed State
Energy Score Key:
Low = -1 ~ Normal = 0 ~ High = 1
Irritation Score Key:
None = 0 ~ Mild = 1 ~ Moderate = 2 ~ Severe = 3
Anxiety Score Key:
None = 0 ~ Mild = 1 ~ Moderate = 2 ~ Severe = 3
Migraine Score Key:
None = 0 ~ Mild = 1 ~ Moderate = 2 ~ Severe = 3 ~ Extreme = 4 ~ Aura Present = A
Sleep Quality Score Key:
Bad = -1 ~ Normal = 0 ~ Great = 1
Special Notes for the Week
Menses Start Date: ~
Weigh-In at Med Clinic: ~
Sunday ~ January 1, 2017
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: -1 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: Honestly don’t know, feels like I slept off and on all day
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 75mg Topamax @ 9pm
Meals
- 4 cups of coffee
- 12oz. can of Dr. Pepper
- fudge – a few pieces, it’s pretty rich
- 1 bowl of homemade chili
Notes
- husband left at around 5am this morning
- Little Bear was in horrible mood most of day today
- my tinnitus was pretty bad today along with my balance, not sure why
Monday ~ January 2, 2017
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: -1 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 2am, up at 5am, napped off and on after 12pm
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
Meals
- cheese and pepperoni around 2am
- 12oz. can of Dr. Pepper
- 3 cups of coffee
Notes
Tuesday ~ January 3, 2017
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: -1 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 3am, up at 6am – 3 hours total – then napped off and on all day
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
Meals
- 3 cups coffee
- 1 large coffee from gas station
- 3 eggs, 2 wheat toast, lots of bacon (was STARVING this morning)
- 2 pcs. fried chicken
Notes
- Scholar Owl’s Med Clinic appointment
- Need to call insurance company and make sure their mail order pharmacy has the correct address for everyone – failed to do that
- remembered to request refill for Little Bear’s meds at front desk while we were there, go me!
- Little Bear didn’t want to go to school this morning but I did manage to get him out the door and on the bus in time
- Little Bear told me when he got home from school today that he saw Daddy at school with the principal – something about his teacher wanting him there? fucking great, my husband is up to his shit like he was last year from the looks of it which might explain why I haven’t had an actual IEP meeting with the school yet
Wednesday ~ January 4, 2017
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: -1 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 2A
Hours of Sleep: bed at 7pm night before, up at 3am – 8 hours total (woke up with migraine)
Slept off and on all day today because of migraine, but didn’t really feel like sleep
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 1 Zyrtec OTC @ 3am
- 600mg Ibuprophen @ 3am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 600mg Ibuprophen @ 7am
- 600mg Ibuprophen @ 11am
- 600mg Ibuprophen @ 3pm
- 600mg Ibuprophen @ 7pm
- 75mg Topamax @7pm
Meals
- 2 cups coffee
- 4 packets of instant oatmeal
- 1 hotdog on wheat bread
- a piece of fudge (I think?)
Notes
- no public school today thanks to icy roads
- in my research on migraines I’ve read that those with Bipolar that also suffer from Migraine Disorder that migraine attacks are connected to hypomanic/manic episodes so given the fact that my migraines are coming back in frequency despite the meds tells me I’m not likely out of the hypomanic phase even if the med isn’t letting me feel the full effect of the episode, if that makes sense? it’s like my brain went there when things got crazy in November but now I don’t feel like I’m there anymore, but I’m still having these migraine attacks so my brain is trying to go there – so this tells me a few things: 1) I need to bring up my game in the self care and keep my stress levels down as best I can 2) I seriously ought to look into a rescue pain med for this time frame but if I find myself using it too often then I need to switch it out with another preventive med to add with the Topamax – I refuse to sink back into daily pain
Thursday ~ January 5, 2017
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: -2 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: fuck being awake! we’re sleeping forever!!!
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 2tsp. Robatussin @ 6am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 2tsp. Robatussin @ 10am
- 2tsp. Robatussin @ 2pm
- 2tsp. Robatussin @ 6pm
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
- 2tsp. Robatussin @ 10pm
- I know I took Ibuprophen in all this but fuck if I know when
Meals
- 4 cups coffee
- 2 plates of spaghetti with tomato sauce and parm. cheese
Notes
- someone just shoot me now and end this yuck known as the sick, having one cold is bad enough – getting slammed with two is fucking evil and should be banned from the life experience, I forbid it – fuck this shit *pretends to be dead and prays the children will not blow up the house*
Friday ~ January 6, 2017
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 9pm night before, up at 4am because who the fuck knows – 7 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 2tsp. Robatussin @ 6am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 2tsp. Robatussin @ 10am
- 2tsp. Robatussin @ 2pm
- 2tsp. Robatussin @ 6pm
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
- 2tsp. Robatussin @ 10pm
- and Ibuprophen but couldn’t tell you how often
Meals
- 5 cups coffee
- I know I had dinner but I don’t remember what it was
Notes
Saturday ~ January 7, 2017
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: -2 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 10pm, up at 9am, and then slept off and on the rest of the day
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- forgot morning Topamax
- 75mg Topamax @ 9pm
- 1 Zyrtec OTC @ 9pm
- and Ibuprophen all day that I didn’t record
- the Robatussin I failed to record as well
Meals
- 3 cups of coffee
- 1 bowl of yellow split pea soup
Notes
- Mom is on her weird campaigns again, started last night at the dinner table – the whole control freak shit again and this time Dad got in the middle of it, seriously though if you’re going to tell a child that if they want to go sledding that they need to clean their room first you don’t start adding shit to that list after they get their room cleaned faster than you expected them to – Dad got pissed off at me and Mom was all like “well I told him he needed to clean his desk last night” but that wasn’t listed at any point as the conditions of going sledding this afternoon until after he got his room cleaned and then she wonders why my boys don’t fucking like her and rarely ever want to do shit with her, she pulls shit like that and to them it comes across as underhanded and sneaky
Please, be careful with the ibuprofen. You should only take 2400mg in a day (that’s the prescription level amount). And if you are taking 600mg at a time, you should be taking it at least 6 hours apart. Taking it more then that can really eat your guts up. It can cause nausea, vomiting, loose stools and abdomen pain. Not to mention other bad things. Ok, worried rant over. Sorry, I just worry about you. Huggles. I hope you feel better soon! <3
You are heard. This is part of the reason I think I need something different for pain. I don’t think I wrote everything down for last week like I should – like why I was taking the pain medicine and now I don’t remember exactly. That’s frustrating. Was it low level migraine, dental, joint pain, or sinus? I don’t fucking remember and a pain management specialist would need to know why on certain days I take that fucking much medication. Because it’s not all the time. I don’t know why I was thinking 4 hours. It’s 100mg per hour for pain meds max. I might not have a GI bug at all. I feel like shit and it may be that it’s because I fuck up the med. I might not be absorbing my Topamax right either because of it. *faceplant* Thank you for the reminder. I’ll lay off the pain med as best as I can and see if that helps any. At this point I think I’ve created a vicious cycle. I’ve always wondered if posting my mood trackers were of any use, but every once in a awhile something like this comes up where someone sees a pattern that I don’t see. <3 So in that respect I think it is very good. Thanks.
I think that is one good thing about all of us sharing things. It’s easy to miss stuff. Comes back to the 2 heads are better then 1 idea 🙂 and you’re welcome.
Kind of messed up to know you can cause pain by taking too much pain killers. It really can cause it’s own evil spiral. I’m wondering now how much of the overall malaise I’m feeling is from that?
Could be causing the GI stuff for sure. And when you over use a pain med it can cause rebound pain as the med is coming out of your system which usually presents as general body ache with ibuprofen.
Get better soon!
Thanks, my sister just pointed out a med error on my part with the pain killers so hopefully I’ll fix half the problem by correcting that. <3