I’m getting tired of Dad continuously sticking these jabs of his with the homeschooling of Scholar Owl. MY SON WAS FAILING PUBLIC SCHOOL AND BEING HELD BACK. Right now my son is doing just the minimum of what needs to be done to get the grade he needs to move on. So why is my father riding my ass, telling me I need to micromanage this boy? I told him today that micromanaging him isn’t going to prepare him for the world when he gets out there. And he was all like “Well you need to do something to get him through.” Well aren’t you the one that just said to me that as long as he was earning a C – or even as low as a D – the state wasn’t going to allow me to hold him back a grade? And then he goes on this speech about how I shouldn’t have pulled him from public school and shouldn’t be homeschooling him. BUT HE WAS GETTING STRAIGHT ZEROES IN PUBLIC SCHOOL. So how was that better? Make him learn that he has to repeat the grade. Wait… so if he’s in public school I’m supposed to let him just fail but if I’m homeschooling him I need to breathe down his neck, crack the whip, and make him earn grades higher than a C? Is this what my father is trying to fucking tell me? This is the twisted shit I fucking deal with every day. If it’s not coming from my mother, I’m getting it from him.
I. Can’t. Fucking. Win.
I don’t know what to fucking do anymore because it won’t fucking matter what I do. He will push until I break and then I’ll be the bad guy. He’ll push until I break and send my child back to public school who will start failing again and then I’ll catch holy hell just like before. It won’t fall on my son who is way fucking old enough to own his own shit. It will fall on me. It’s fucking bullshit. All of it.
It isn’t my life. It isn’t my education. It isn’t my future. It’s my son’s. All his. If my son wants all that HE NEEDS TO GET OFF HIS ASS AND EARN IT. I am so tired of everyone expecting me to just hand this shit over on a silver platter like I have it to give. I don’t have a future to give him when he needs to build it. All I can do is give him the tools and show him how to use them – which is what I have done and have been doing. And I will continue to do that.
But seriously what the fuck. Do my parents expect me to start job hunting for my son? What about the job interview? How about the job itself? And then his generation wonders WHY helicopter parenting is happening. It’s because of this fucking shit. They won’t fucking let go. They won’t fucking let us be the parents of our own children.
Fuck this shit. Fuck this noise. Just fuck it all.
I will make this work. Somehow. Because fuck it. I’m tired of him trying to take over. This isn’t his show – it’s mine. And these are my kids, not his. He isn’t the one that has to deal with the legal fall out. I am. Scholar Owl is. Living in his house doesn’t change that fact with homeschooling. Doesn’t change who has legal responsibility. He’s not taking over.
Not trying to control me? Bullshit. What the fuck do you call this then? It’s not advice.