This post will be the only thing I’ve written today. In fact, I only managed to do one critique over at Scribophile. I’m trying not to let the sense of duty/obligation over ride my need for rest.
Yes, I’m a member of that community now and I want very much to be a part of it. It does require extensive involvement and networking. Right now my brain feels fried. As much as I understand that this is a give and take process, I don’t think I can give anyone my best right now. There is nothing worse than a useless, shit critique that feels like nothing more than karma farming. It’s not the kind of critique I want to give.
In retrospect, I’m wondering if it was wise of me to attempt Camp NaNo this month. I didn’t expect Scholar Owl to back peddle out of it like he had and I was looking forward to discussing the art of story telling with him. Plus, during NaNoWriMo I went hypomanic to the point I was worried I was going over the edge into mania. This time around I feel like I’m in a mixed state and stuff is just wonky as hell.
So before the cut off date, I altered my word count goal from 50k to 30k and I figured I would count whatever I do manage to write. I don’t care if it’s a story, poem, or a blog post. As long as I’m still writing without killing myself.
With the new goal in place, I’m almost there. Only 4k words to go actually and in the first two days I easily hit beyond that mark. Now just trying to focus enough to write this is a mega pain in the ass.
I have no idea how I’m going to validate the word count since this month I’ve been all over the place with what and where I’ve been writing.
I’m hoping to start having a rolling weekly schedule of posts on the Chaos Pen of various creative works. I’ve barely launched it and I’m already feeling stressed about it. I worry that setting it to weekly may be too much. I don’t feel like I’m a prolific writer at the moment. When I am, it’s thanks to hypomania and chances are whatever I write is a mess while in that mind set.
We’ll see. Maybe I’m worrying about nothing.