So far all this week I feel like I’ve been swimming in the sea of “I don’t know what the hell I’m doing!” and roaming the land of “Where the hell am I right now?” By the time the end of the week rolled around, I felt like I might as well have stamped the word “IDIOT” in bold letters on my forehead and just stayed in bed – if I could only stay still long enough for that. Not depressed, just frustrated with the tangled thoughts in my head.
Mood Score Key:
Sliding Hypomania = 1 ~ Hypomania = 2 ~ Mania = 3 ~ Baseline (My Normal) = 0
Sliding Depression = -1 ~ Depression = -2 ~ Severe Depression = -3 ~ M = Mixed State
Energy Score Key:
Low = -1 ~ Normal = 0 ~ High = 1
Migraine Score Key:
None = 0 ~ Mild = 1 ~ Moderate = 2 ~ Severe = 3 ~ Extreme = 4 ~ Aura Present = A
Sleep Quality Score Key:
Bad = -1 ~ Normal = 0 ~ Great = 1
Special Notes for the Week
Menses Start Date: 8/31/18
Weigh-In at Med Clinic: ~
Sunday ~ August 26, 2018
Mood: 2 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 4am, up at 9am – 5 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
Meals
- ? cups of coffee
- boiled dinner (with corned beef)
Today’s Feelings
- ?
Notes
- it appears the boys are starting to get back on track with their sleep, wish I could say the same for myself
Monday ~ August 27, 2018
Mood: 2 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep:
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
Meals
- ? cups off coffee
- leftover corned beef
- spaghetti with meat sauce
Today’s Feelings
- ?
Notes
Tuesday ~ August 28, 2018
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Migraine: 1A
Hours of Sleep: bed at 3pm, up at 5pm – 2 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 600mg Ibuprofen @ 5pm
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
Meals
- 1 large coffee from gas station
- ? cups of coffee
- baked chicken, tater tots, carrots
Today’s Feelings
Notes
- Little Bear’s first day of school
- Therapy Tuesday
Wednesday ~ August 29, 2018
Mood: ? ~ Energy: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 3am, up at 6:30am – 3.5 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
Meals
- ? cups of coffee
Today’s Feelings
- fucked if I know
Notes
Thursday ~ August 30, 2018
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Migraine: 1A
Hours of Sleep: bed at 2am, up at 7am – 5 hours total (how did I sleep through 2 alarms?)
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7:30am
- 600mg Ibuprofen @ 12pm
- 600mg Ibuprofen @ 6pm
- 75mg Topamax @ 8pm
Meals
- 4 cups of coffee
- sliced pepperoni
Today’s Feelings
- frustrated
Notes
- I woke up in a damn fog
- I think I’m crashing – worst timing EVER for this given the fact my ex shows up tomorrow for his visit
Friday ~ August 31, 2018
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 10:30pm, up at 5:30am – 7 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
Meals
- 3 cups of coffee
- fried chicken, fresh mango
Today’s Feelings
- content first half of the day
- dull and tired second half of the day
Notes
- woke up with a clearer head today
- ex is supposed to arrive today and wants to pick up Little Bear from school
- he arrived early, took Scholar Owl to lunch, and he did bring Little Bear straight home from school
- half a day here and he managed to set Little Bear off THREE times
Saturday ~ September 1, 2018
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: -1 ~ Migraine: 1h
Hours of Sleep: bed at 2:30am, up at 9am – 6.5 total hours
napped 12pm to 5pm – 5 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 9am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
Meals
- 5 cups of coffee
- 2 pcs. leftover chicken, fresh mango & cantaloupe
- cheese and graham crackers
Today’s Feelings
- blah
Notes
- ex showed up at 9am and left at 7pm
- Little Bear barely wanted to spend time with him today
- same with the other two boys for that matter
- getting harder to get them to hang out with him
- fairly certain I’ve crashed from the mania/hypomania at this point