It feels like it’s been an incredibly long week this week and things have been highly stressful. I have a ton of juggling ahead of me schedule wise and not surprisingly, I’m not hearing much in the way of support from my parents. Nothing new there. At all.
Mood Score Key:
Sliding Hypomania = 1 ~ Hypomania = 2 ~ Mania = 3 ~ Baseline (My Normal) = 0
Sliding Depression = -1 ~ Depression = -2 ~ Severe Depression = -3 ~ M = Mixed State
Energy Score Key:
Low = -1 ~ Normal = 0 ~ High = 1
Migraine Score Key:
None = 0 ~ Mild = 1 ~ Moderate = 2 ~ Severe = 3 ~ Extreme = 4 ~ Aura Present = A
Sleep Quality Score Key:
Bad = -1 ~ Normal = 0 ~ Great = 1
Special Notes for the Week
Menses Start Date: 9/26/18
Weigh-In at Med Clinic: ~
Sunday ~ September 23, 2018
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 10pm, up at 5:30am – 7.5 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
Meals
- 4 cups of coffee
- cheeseburgers
Today’s Feelings
- upbeat
- productive
Notes
- finished up on the backlog of practice orders of reading I had from the mentoring forum – for now it seems my ticket system works, but I think I may need to give myself a little more time for due dates to accommodate longer lists
- as my list got closer to 10, I was no longer sure that 48 hours would be enough time to get orders complete and still hit my self imposed deadline which naturally triggered stressed
- not sure yet where I need to set my window, but I know now that 48 hours to write quality readings won’t be enough time if I get flooded
Monday ~ September 24, 2018
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 1am, up at 6am – 5 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 8:30am
- 75mg Topamax @ 8pm
Meals
- ? cups of coffee
- biscuits and gravy
Today’s Feelings
- content
Notes
- set up med box
- worked on letter head and templates today
- played Cards Against Humanity with the family tonight
Tuesday ~ September 25, 2018
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 4am, up at 7:30am – 3.5 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7:45am
- forgot night meds
Meals
- ? cups of coffee
- 1 large coffee from gas station
- cobb salad w/ avocado and steak strips
Today’s Feelings
- extremely stressed and frustrated
Notes
- my therapy day
- Scholar Owl’s med clinic day – got the day wrong, it’s tomorrow
- Little Bear got suspended from school for a week thanks to something he did on the bus, now I have to have him evaluated over at the hospital before he can come back to school
Wednesday ~ September 26, 2018
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Migraine: 1A
Hours of Sleep: honestly don’t remember
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 600mg Ibuprofen @ 7am
- 1000mg Tylenol @ 11am
- 600mg Ibuprofen @ 2pm
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
Meals
- ? cups of coffee
- baked chicken, baked potatoes with butter and cheese, canned tropical fruit salad
Today’s Feelings
- stressed out to the max
Notes
- Little Bear med clinic @ 8:30am
- Scholar Owl med clinic @ 9:30am
- Dad acted like today was the first time he had ever heard about me having a personality disorder or that I was screened for anything as a child
- he was the one that told me about the hearing test they did because I wasn’t responding to my name and they told them that I have hyper focus
- which I must say is something he is oddly proud of, and something I never understood why anyone would think hyper focus is a good thing
- it’s not when you don’t have control on what it zeroes in on
- which I must say is something he is oddly proud of, and something I never understood why anyone would think hyper focus is a good thing
- he was the one that told me about the hearing test they did because I wasn’t responding to my name and they told them that I have hyper focus
Thursday ~ September 27, 2018
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 3am, up at 7am – 4 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
Meals
- 2 cups of coffee
- leftover baked potato with butter and cheese
- a bunch of Oreoes
Today’s Feelings
- still stressed out to the max
Notes
- Little Bear got a spot for the day program at the hospital
- was told the other two boys will just have to miss their music lessons despite the fact they’ve been paid for in advance
- fine, I’ve made arrangements to reschedule one son so I can still take him and I need to make sure the other can still get to his somehow without their help
- it’s always this way – always
- temporarily closed my free readings thread on the mentor forums
- was informed that my storage shed isn’t going to get built this year even though I paid for it and Dad bought the materials with the money I gave him
- I don’t know what the fuck is going on with that
- people have said they will help, but since it’s not my brother he’s not interested in their help because they don’t have carpentry experience
- my brother doesn’t either – he does whatever Dad tells him
- heaven forbid someone else lends a helping hand
- my brother has too much shit on his plate right now with his own property and Dad pulls this shit
- despite everything going on, I resent feeling like everyone and everything else is more important than me and what I need yet again
- I’ve only been waiting for this fucking thing all summer
- all summer there has been something more important to deal with
- I don’t have words to describe how I feel about this
- actually… I feel as though I’m not permitted to express how I feel about this and I resent that too
- started watching Altered Carbon on Netflix – enjoying it so far
Friday ~ September 28, 2018
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: -1 ~ Migraine: 2A
Hours of Sleep: bed ta 1:30am, up at 6am – 4.5 hours total
napped 1pm to 6:30pm – 5.5 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 9am
- 10mg Propranolol @ 9am
- 600mg Ibuprofen @ 12pm
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
Meals
- 6 cups of coffee
- 3 burgers – 2 on buns with cheese
Today’s Feelings
- anxious
- tired
- annoyed as fuck
Notes
- worked on letterhead and reading templates for Tode’s Tarot
- finished watching Altered Carbon – really liked it
Saturday ~ September 29, 2018
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 3:30am, up at 11:30am – 8 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- AM meds missed
- 75mg Topamax @ 9pm
Meals
- 4 cups of coffee
Today’s Feelings
- agitated
Notes
- finished reading template for Celtic Cross spread