It feels like it’s been a very busy week.
Mood Score Key:
Sliding Hypomania = 1 ~ Hypomania = 2 ~ Mania = 3 ~ Baseline (My Normal) = 0
Sliding Depression = -1 ~ Depression = -2 ~ Severe Depression = -3 ~ M = Mixed State
Energy Score Key:
Low = -1 ~ Normal = 0 ~ High = 1
Irritation Score Key:
None = 0 ~ Mild = 1 ~ Moderate = 2 ~ Severe = 3
Anxiety Score Key:
None = 0 ~ Mild = 1 ~ Moderate = 2 ~ Severe = 3
Migraine Score Key:
None = 0 ~ Mild = 1 ~ Moderate = 2 ~ Severe = 3 ~ Extreme = 4 ~ Aura Present = A
Sleep Quality Score Key:
Bad = -1 ~ Normal = 0 ~ Great = 1
Special Notes for the Week
Menses Start Date: 1/30/2019 (27 days)
Weigh-In at Med Clinic: ~
Sunday ~ January 27, 2019
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Irritation: 1 ~ Anxiety: 1 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 2am, up at 11am – 9 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- AM meds missed
- inserted vape cartridge @ 7pm
- 75mg Topamax @ 7:30pm
- 10mg Propranolol @ 7:30pm
Meals
- 4 cups of coffee
- 1 glass of milk
- 2 grilled cheese sandwiches on wheat
- snow peas
- popcorn
Today’s Feelings
- productive
Notes
- began scheduling Chaos Pen posts
- completed 2019 #9 – #11
- found out at the gas station that the “regular” flavor vape cartridges are cheaper than the specialty flavored ones
- normally a dollar less, but right now they are on sale
- so like, the mint and melon, etc. flavored ones cost $8 and the so called “tobacco” flavored one costs $7
- but they’re not targeting and taking advantage of children who have a larger disposable income (eye roll)
- you can’t convince me these cartridges cost more to make
- the Juul brand kit alone costs $35
- and advertises itself as the adult smoking alternative experience
- okay… smoking age here is 21… like I need to be told that I need an adult experience of any kind?
- but kids aren’t being targeted here… I call bullshit
- okay… smoking age here is 21… like I need to be told that I need an adult experience of any kind?
- and advertises itself as the adult smoking alternative experience
- but they’re not targeting and taking advantage of children who have a larger disposable income (eye roll)
- played RE2 Remake with Tuxedo Cat’s father
Monday ~ January 28, 2019
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 4:30am, up at 6am – 1.5 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 9:30am
- 10mg Propranolol @ 9:30am
- 1 multivitamin @ 9:30am
- inserted vape cartridge @ 7pm
- 75mg Topamax @ 7:30pm
- 10mg Propranolol @ 7:30pm
Meals
- 5 cups of coffee
- pizza hut feast
Today’s Feelings
- content
- productive
Notes
- refilled med boxes
- began scheduling Chaos Pen posts
- completed 2019 #12 – #16
- went to watch Tuxedo Cat’s basketball game with the boys and Tuxedo Cat’s father
- ate at Pizza Hut after
- talked in the car with Scholar Owl on the drive there about how nice it was for all of this to feel normal and stable
- Tuxedo Cat’s father’s increased involvement I mean
- Scholar Owl agreed that it felt natural and more like what families should be like, even though we are a blended family
- I’m grateful that Tuxedo Cat’s father and I are friends first and foremost who value the well-being of not just these boys, but his daughter too
- it’s a shame we don’t get to see and hang out with her much but maybe we can work something out on a weekend he has her
- tried to watch the last three episodes of Punisher with Tuxedo Cat’s father, but I passed out on him
- I vaguely remember him telling me goodnight and promising to lock the door
- also remember feeling bad and him telling me to not worry about it
- god I love this man
Tuesday ~ January 29, 2019
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: fell asleep at 10pm – up at 5:30am – 7.5 hours total
napped 2pm – 6pm – 4 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 10mg Propranolol @ 7am
- 1 multivitamin @ 7am
- inserted vape cartridge @ 7am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
- 10mg Propranolol @ 7pm
- inserted vape cartridge @ 11pm
Meals
- 3 cups of coffee
- 2 leftover slices of pizza
Today’s Feelings
- content
Notes
- Therapy Tuesday
- after that I let Little Bear pick the show on Netflix and hung out with him
- for some reason this resulted in me taking an all day nap
- spent the evening with Tuxedo Cat’s father
- actually watched the last three episodes of Punisher without falling asleep
- really glad he was willing to watch them again with me so soon
- got laundry done while watching the episodes
- actually watched the last three episodes of Punisher without falling asleep
Wednesday ~ January 30, 2019
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Irritation: 2 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 3am, up at 5:30am – 2.5 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- inserted vape cartridge @ 8am (appeared to be leaking when I opened it)
- 75mg Topamax @ 9am
- 10mg Propranolol @ 9am
- 1 multivitamin @ 9am
- inserted vape cartridge @ 2pm (it malfunctioned for some reason?!!)
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
- 10mg Propranolol @ 7pm
- 600mg Ibuprofen @ 7pm
- inserted vape cartridge @ 7:30pm
Meals
- 4 cups of coffee
- ham, potato puffs, canned pineapple
Today’s Feelings
- productive
- not sure why, but at around dinner I got cranky as hell
- I felt like I had been hit by a truck, so that was part of it
Notes
- no school due to snow
- scheduled more Chaos Pen posts
- completed 2019 #17 – #23
- streamlined the image template for these posts to make scheduling faster
- only seemed to cut the time it takes in half – better than nothing
- observation: the vape cartridges from the gas station seem to taste stronger for some reason
- probably this product has a higher turn over rate here?
- spent the evening with Tuxedo Cat’s father
- watched an episode of Gotham on Hulu
- watched Solo on Netflix
- he spent the night!
- it was lovely being able to sleep night to him even though I am untouchable right now
- also grateful that he was forgiving of my grumpy mood in the beginning of the evening
Thursday ~ January 31, 2019
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 1am, up at 6am – 5 hours total
napped 2pm-4pm – 2 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 9am
- 10mg Propranolol @ 9am
- 1 multivitamin @ 9am
- inserted vape cartridge @ 12pm
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
- 10mg Propranolol @ 7pm
Meals
- 4 cups of coffee
- 1 glass Dr. Pepper
- fried chicken, pasta salad, green salad, cinnamon rolls
Today’s Feelings
- content
Notes
- I wish I had the option of lingering in bed with Tuxedo Cat’s father this morning instead of needing to get up right away to get boys ready for school today
- I wish he had slept as well as I had, but I know it’s because this isn’t his home so I understand
- scheduled more Chaos Pen posts
- completed 2019 #24 – #29
- boys’ music lessons
- evening with Tuxedo Cat’s father
- watched “In Defense of Food” on Netflix after dinner
Friday ~ February 1, 2019
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Irritation: 1 ~ Anxiety: 1 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at midnight, up at 6am – 6 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 10mg Propranolol @ 7am
- 1 multivitamin @ 7am
- inserted vape cartridge @ ? (I think it was around 2pm)
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
- 10mg Propranolol @ 7pm
Meals
- 4 cups of coffee
- Mac & Cheese, Fruit Cocktail, Salad
Today’s Feelings
- content
- productive
- mildly peeved
Notes
- started putting together a family weekly menu together
- cleaned my coffee machine
- scheduled Daily Draw for week 6
- realized after a few phone calls when Tuxedo Cat didn’t get off the bus that there was a make up game today
- my dad was pissed that I was still on the computer, not realizing that I was using it to look up the number for the bus garage since the school’s office wasn’t answering the phone
- the guy at the garage was awesome in helping me find out where the hell my kid was – well above and beyond what he needed to do
- my dad was pissed that I was still on the computer, not realizing that I was using it to look up the number for the bus garage since the school’s office wasn’t answering the phone
- got grocery shopping done
- fridge and pantry cleaned
- by the end of the day I realized I didn’t get the Chaos Rally post for today done
Saturday ~ February 2, 2019
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 9pm, up at 4:30am – 7.5 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 10mg Propranolol @ 7am
- 1 multivitamin @ 7am
- inserted vape cartridge @ 7am
- inserted vape cartridge @ 11am
- inserted vape cartridge @ 5pm
- inserted vape cartridge @ 11pm
Meals
- 7 cups of coffee
- 2 12oz. bottles of hard apple cider
- leftover mac & cheese with ham
Today’s Feelings
- productive
Notes
- scheduled Chaos Rally #5
- scheduled more Chaos Pen posts
- completed 2019 #30 – #43
- went to a birthday party for a mutual friend with Tuxedo Cat’s father