Mostly a quiet week this week.
Mood Score Key:
Sliding Hypomania = 1 ~ Hypomania = 2 ~ Mania = 3 ~ Baseline (My Normal) = 0
Sliding Depression = -1 ~ Depression = -2 ~ Severe Depression = -3 ~ M = Mixed State
Energy Score Key:
Low = -1 ~ Normal = 0 ~ High = 1
Irritation Score Key:
None = 0 ~ Mild = 1 ~ Moderate = 2 ~ Severe = 3
Anxiety Score Key:
None = 0 ~ Mild = 1 ~ Moderate = 2 ~ Severe = 3
Migraine Score Key:
None = 0 ~ Mild = 1 ~ Moderate = 2 ~ Severe = 3 ~ Extreme = 4 ~ Aura Present = A ~ Normal Headache Pain or Pressure = h
Joint Pain Score Key:
None = 0 ~ Mild = 1 ~ Moderate = 2 ~ Severe = 3 ~ Extreme = 4 ~ Tingling = T
Sleep Quality Score Key:
Bad = -1 ~ Normal = 0 ~ Great = 1
Special Notes for the Week
Menses Start Date: ~
Weigh-In at Med Clinic: ~
Sunday ~ June 07, 2020
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0 ~ Joint Pain: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 2am, up at 9am – 7 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 10:30am
- 20mg Propranolol @ 10:30am
- 1 multivitamin @ 10:30am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
- 20mg Propranolol @ 7pm
Meals
- 3 cups of coffee
- pretzles
Today’s Feelings
- content
Notes
- finished on the renders for the last remaining Chaos Rally post of this year
- updated all of my blog post templates so they are now compatible with the new WordPress block system
- not exactly a fan of it, especially with the way cloning my templates work, but I have no choice or say in the matter
- copying a post should still include tags and categories, but it doesn’t anymore and this upsets me to no end
- not exactly a fan of it, especially with the way cloning my templates work, but I have no choice or say in the matter
- written and scheduled the Chaos Rally post for next Friday
- by accident – thought I clicked on the one for this coming Friday
- Golden Knight played online with Little Bear and then Tuxedo Cat
- World War Z with Little Bear
- Uno with Tuxedo Cat
- they all had fun
- I then met up with Golden Knight to watch Invisible Man with him
- yes, sexy time happened too
Monday ~ June 08, 2020
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0 ~ Joint Pain: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 11pm, up at 5am – 6 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 20mg Propranolol @ 7am
- 1 multivitamin @ 7am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
- 20mg Propranolol @ 7pm
Meals
- 3 cups of coffee
- pretzels
- tuna on wheat
Today’s Feelings
- not just calm, but also at peace
Notes
- touched base with Golden Knight this morning regarding what we talked about last Friday on my feelings about being in an open relationship and him leaning towards being exclusive
- he told me that he is comfortable with shifting into being exclusive and changed our Facebook status
- zero fuss and barely any discussion around it
- it is my hope that we are able to continue to talk about other things in the future in this way
- openly and with respect
- he told me that he is comfortable with shifting into being exclusive and changed our Facebook status
- worked on blog
- finished scheduling Chaos Rally post for this coming Friday
- Dad decided to start letting people come over again
- I think it’s mostly because Mom’s was bent out of shape over missing her grandson’s birthday party and my brother’s wife’s parents were there for it and she wasn’t and Dad has finally accepted the fact that this virus isn’t going anywhere and we can’t “sit it out” and hide from it
Tuesday ~ June 09, 2020
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0 ~ Joint Pain: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 11pm, up at 5am – 6 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 10:30am
- 20mg Propranolol @ 10:30am
- 1 multivitamin @ 10:30am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
- 20mg Propranolol @ 7pm
Meals
- 3 cups of coffee
- 2 cups of tea
- 3 slices of ham and black olive pizza
Today’s Feelings
- happy
Notes
- Little Bear pulled one of his classic refusals today
- just noped himself right out of school engagement and slept the whole day
- Golden Knight and my brother’s family was invited over for pizza dinner
Wednesday ~ June 10, 2020
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0 ~ Joint Pain: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 11pm, up at 6am – 7 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 20mg Propranolol @ 7am
- 1 multivitamin @ 7am
- 75mg Topamax @ 7pm
- 20mg Propranolol @ 7pm
Meals
- ? cups of tea
- 1 cups of coffee
- chicken nuggets and fries, fresh fruit
- mini moon pies
- pretzels
Today’s Feelings
- content
Notes
- went grocery shopping
- had dinner with the boys and Golden Knight
- watched Fullmetal Alchemist with Golden Knight after dinner
Thursday ~ June 11, 2020
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0 ~ Joint Pain: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 11pm, up at 7am – 8 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 20mg Propranolol @ 7am
- 1 multivitamin @ 7am
- 75mg Topamax @ 9pm
- 20mg Propranolol @ 9pm
Meals
- ? cups of tea
- 1 cups of coffee
- leftover chicken nuggets and fries
- mini moon pies
- pretzels
Today’s Feelings
- content
Notes
- spent the day tinkering on Minecraft
- Dad of course had to start shit after several days of peace
- today it was telling me that Scholar Owl needs to either find a job or get on disability
- and as I stood there trying to figure out how to respond to this, he gets pissed off
- “Excuse the fuck out of me for worrying about your welfare.”
- okay… how does barking orders at me translate to worry?
- and… what does my adult son doing anything have to do with my welfare?
- and then he goes into how he doesn’t know how much I’m getting in Food Stamps or anything
- how or why is that any of his business?
- and again, what does this have to do with Scholar Owl?
- so I flat out asked him why was he getting upset and accusing me of being offended when I was just standing here trying to figure out how to respond to what he had said
- and then he jumps right into asking questions about the SSI for Tuxedo Cat and Little Bear
- and once again, I had to explain to him that the process for that is very slow
- and again, I can’t help but wonder why all of this matters to him so much
- and then he jumps right into asking questions about the SSI for Tuxedo Cat and Little Bear
- “Excuse the fuck out of me for worrying about your welfare.”
- and as I stood there trying to figure out how to respond to this, he gets pissed off
- today it was telling me that Scholar Owl needs to either find a job or get on disability
- did find in the store today a replacement cable for my PS4 controller for only $5
- spent the evening playing Secret of Mana
Friday ~ June 12, 2020
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Irritation: 0 ~ Anxiety: 0 ~ Migraine: 0 ~ Joint Pain: 0
- 75mg Topamax @ 7am
- 20mg Propranolol @ 7am
- 1 multivitamin @ 7am
- PM meds missed
Meals
- ? cups of tea
- pretzels
- Chicken Alfredo take out from Pizza Hut
Today’s Feelings
- content
Notes
- I really ought to focus on getting the scheduled posts finished for the blog
- worked on blog 9am to 11am
- finished writing and scheduled Chaos Rally 26
- worked on blog 9am to 11am
- Little Bear’s dental appointment
- long 1 hour drive in this heat and then it was a long wait in the parking lot, but at least he did a good job once we were inside
Saturday ~ June 13, 2020
Mood: 0 ~ Energy: 0 ~ Irritation: 1 ~ Anxiety: 1 ~ Migraine: 0 ~ Joint Pain: 0
Hours of Sleep: bed at 3am, up at 12pm – 9 hours total
Sleep Quality: 0
Exercise Activity: ~ Exercise Time:
Meds Taken
- AM meds missed
- 75mg Topamax @ 9pm
- 20mg Propranolol @ 9pm
Meals
- ? cups of tea
- pretzels
- cinnamon buns
Today’s Feelings
- mostly content
Notes
- spent most of the day with Little Bear watching Bleach together
- did get to play some Secret of Mana
- had a run in with my sister, Mythonia, on Facebook
- I’ve asked her before to stay on topic with my posts
- and once again she didn’t, so once again I brought it up
- and this time she pulled one of Dad’s wounded “excuse me” acts
- which of course, set me right off
- and this time she pulled one of Dad’s wounded “excuse me” acts
- so apparently now she will never comment on my posts again
- which was so not the point of me setting the boundary I tried to set
- the frustrating part is that I don’t regret anything I said
- I meant every word:
- I don’t do this with her posts so it’s not too much to ask that she do the same for me
- and it pisses me off that she pretends she doesn’t understand what I’m talking about
- and I referred to the last post prior to this one as an example that her comments derailed as an example
- where I had also asked her to stay on topic
- yet I feel like the bad guy here
- and it doesn’t help that Golden Knight calls my directness harsh when I know I wasn’t rude
- our “niceness” culture nearly got me killed, I’m done with it
- I can still be a kind and compassionate person without being silent
- I can speak up without obfuscating my intentions or emotions
- neither of these things makes me a villain but if it makes them feel better, fine
- nothing I can do about it anyway so long as they respect my boundaries
- our “niceness” culture nearly got me killed, I’m done with it
- and it doesn’t help that Golden Knight calls my directness harsh when I know I wasn’t rude
- I meant every word:
- the frustrating part is that I don’t regret anything I said
- which was so not the point of me setting the boundary I tried to set
