First release from the rounds of Scribopile. It’s an old story of mine that I felt could be spruced up. Hopefully I will have plenty more to come soon.
This is what I came up with for Chaos Pen Challenge #4. I think officially I missed the element of “economic crisis” in the challenge set, unless you want to count the need to produce babies an economic challenge for a kingdom. I mean… I don’t know? It’s a long stretch, I know. Shoot me. Bleh. I still haven’t figured out in my head why that’s even a thing for these people. It just is. Why aren’t they having babies? Why is crossbreeding bad for the upper class? Why are half-breeds rare to begin with? I’m running around with species on my pages I know nothing about. @_@
It was hard for me to write this piece. It was difficult for me to be in Angelia’s head because I have felt the things she feels and for similar reasons (but not exact). And there is one in entire scene I “cheated” and pulled the fade to black. I hope it’s clear what happened without needing the explicit visual details. Essentially this is a story about domestic violence in a fantasy setting and because it’s a fantasy story and it’s my blog I will say she does get rescued. Yeah I know… SPOILERS. I didn’t say how. You have to read it find out.
The other thing is, thanks to using solely randomized challenges and prompts continuity and facts and whatnot can some times get wonky. This story already messed up some info that was revealed in the last story. So I’m just going to apologize ahead of time for that. But I suppose if this ever turned itself into a book… that’s what revision is for?
Anyhow, anyone that’s just joining me in this weird randomized serial adventure, you can find it all here. As always comments are welcome. Let me know what you think.
Here is the revised edition of Part 2 for this story. As I said before, this is pretty much the same story but from a different character’s point of view. So some scenes are kind of the same, but you do get different information. I feel this character reveals more of what’s going on. If you haven’t read Part 1 yet and you would like to, CLICK HERE. Scrivener word count for Part 2 is 9,364 so once again it’s longer than my previous Chaos Pen short stories. I hope you enjoy it. Feel free to post your comments below.
Well this took me an unexpected 8 days to write. I did have to split it into two parts. Here is the first part. Hopefully it’s properly revised and polished otherwise I’ll be back to tweak it. According to Scrivener, it’s 9,171 words long so it’s a bit longer than most short stories I guess.
I still need to work on Part 2 which will be the same story, but using the point of view of the other character. With the unedited two parts blended together the story came out to be a little over 20k words long. I haven’t decided which I liked better. Honestly I could probably work on Part 1 a little longer, but I think I need a different set of eyes and after I’ve worked on the other half of it. Part 2 reveals a ton of information and I’ve debated on whether I ought to release it at all. Together though they potentially provide a platform for a story arc I didn’t plan for. This randomized challenge launched plot bunnies everywhere. Pretty sad that I only intended for 3k per short story. This just ran away on me like a beast.
Anyhow, I hope you enjoy Part 1. Your thoughts on it as you wait for Part 2 are welcomed.
And of course, here is the link with the random prompts used for it:
- The story must have a demon at the beginning.
- A character becomes intoxicated.
- A character is sorry throughout most of the story.
- During the story, a character is forced to go shopping.
So thanks to the demon challenge, this story starts off dark and graphic. I assume you’re used to my language by now.
“And then the mighty Paladin in his bright white shiny-whiny armor sweeps the beautiful maiden into his arms,” said a small cherub-like fellow with silver hair. Soulful gray eyes sparkled in the morning light as his tiny arms swung wide to either side of his chubby body. His spectacles slid down his browned nose as he continued, “He looks deep into her deep brown eyes and says -”
Wrapped up in fishing gear, Rhae sat on the bank of a peaceful pond. A simple leather strap pulled her ruby hair up from her face. Cat like ears twitched away a stray gnat. Her dark eyes glowered at the water as she stretched her long legs. She held her pole as the tip of her tail tapped a muted rhythm. Continue reading
“Here is the message we received via the BEE system, sir” the lady said to Crow, as she made a few adjustments to the mobile uplink on his wrist. Continue reading