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Three Days Left

Where the hell has the time gone? The husband is supposed to be here this Wednesday and I still have boxes of shit all over the place to sort through in my parents’ living room. I don’t feel ready to deal with his shit right now.

He shocked the hell out of me though. The allotment came in higher than he said it would. Instead of the $750 he said it was going to be, he sent us $900. So I have no idea what the hell that phone call was about.

I guess he just wanted a fight and managed to snag me at a time when I wasn’t up for it? I don’t know. Don’t care.

I have money for Christmas for the boys now. Yeah, you read that right. One week before Christmas and I haven’t done a lick of shopping yet. And the only people getting gifts from me are my boys. Fucking depressing as hell, but what else can I do?

He’s still not winning brownie points with me because of this. It still doesn’t change the math when you crunch the numbers or the overall fact of why we ultimately had to move in here with my parents.

And this bullshit of him telling me that I married him for his money is a crock of shit. I had more resources, aid, and money available to me before I met him than I do now. I knew that going into the marriage. The SSI and everything dropped after and then we lost it completely after he joined the Army. So no, that isn’t why I married him. I loved him and believed in him. That shit was a mistake and it’s been a fucking war ever since. I’d rather be dirt poor than deal with this shit.

And as soon as I figure out how to make sure that I get physical custody of Little Bear so he stays on his medical care plan that he desperately needs to be on, I’m filing for a divorce. Fuck. This. Shit.

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